So, first official post:

I'm currently writing this from the receptionist desk of a tech service company in downtown Chicago- I'm temping today.

I do have a full time job working as a manager of a salon but on my day off I decided to take this one.

I'm not ashamed to admit that I need the money. Like most of my fellow millennials, who work a few jobs at a time, I am no different. I'm in this spot currently because I'm in between theater gigs at the moment. I do have a contract for later in September but I have to pay bills in the meantime.

That's where my frustration comes from.

Now don't misunderstand me. I understand the necessity of paying rent and health insurance and car insurance and all of those things necessary to live in this country. But, damn is it expensive.
Like, I am worried about buying groceries and still paying rent worried.

I can't understand how someone can work for about forty hours a week and not be able to afford food.

I'm lucky though, because if I ever needed it, my parents would undoubtedly help me in any way that they could. I feel like a sh*tty daughter every time I ask for help, though, not because they make me feel bad but because I'm supposed to be an adult and have my act together. That's where my anxiety and frustration come from. I don't want to have to call my parents when I can't afford medicine. I would love to travel and see them more often but I can't because I have to work every day I can so that I can afford my rent and pay my bills. All of the anxiety and frustration compound on top of one another until I feel like I'm sinking under the weight of it all. 

I'm not irresponsible- I pay my college loans, rent, car insurance, paying off my car, and my utilities. That amounts to about a little over a thousand dollars a month. It doesn't seem too bad until you factor in the other external expenses that one needs to pay in order to live- food, gas, clothes, etc. If I pay the minimum it still would amount to probably two hundred more a month in addition to my bills. So with a grand total of twelve hundred dollars needed a month to survive and with a job paying roughly fifteen dollars an hour you'd think that would be enough to pay for everything, save a little and have some left over for miscellaneous expenses. You'd be wrong.

Part of the money I make a month gets taken out by taxes. I understand that taxes are a thing- I understand that in order to make this country/government run that I have to pay taxes. It's not the taxes that I take issue with. It's the amount that I get paid.

I shouldn't have to scrimp and worry because I don't get paid enough. I should be able to work forty hours a week and be able to afford a living.

So now the question is- What can be done?

Well for starters, we need a living wage, minimum wage across the board should be updated and maintained equal to the cost of living. I shouldn't have to work two jobs at the same time to afford just to survive. No one should.

Second, we need to reevaluate the amount we spend in taxes. Now this comes from the government but it's up to us the people to demand this from our politicians. I know, especially now that there's been a feeling in the public that the people in power don't work for us and I understand. I feel the same. It's still our responsibility to put people in power that will actually create change and work for us. It's our responsibility to hold those people accountable and fight for the things we need. We have to demand it and fight for it, otherwise things wont change.

I know that some of you reading this will, no doubt, be demoralized because I'm not offering a ready made solution to this problem. I understand and I wish it could be that simple. Unfortunately, if we want lasting change we're going to have to fight for it. We're going to have to vote people into places of power that will make the policy changes and make them last. We need to do this. I need to do this and I will. Because I'm tired. I'm tired of the worry and the feeling of failure.

I'm fighting.